None of us like them, right? Red streaks that remind us of how large we’ve become. Yet, often those stretch marks are a result of something amazing happening, like carrying a baby for nine months, or gaining muscle mass (or fat) rapidly! Regardless of what caused them, most of us don’t want them.

Have you ever stopped to think we might be getting mental stretch marks too? Like when you learn of an unexpected pregnancy, or receive news of cancer, or have to accept a relationship is over. Changes in life cause us to mentally grow in ways we might never imagine or want.

The idea of mental stretch marks came to mind after taking a job with an organization I was passionate about. Right away, I felt stretched when asked to fill a position I hadn’t been trained for. Since God had thrown open the door to this opportunity, I knew I needed to step through and trust Him. Soon, I realized the job itself wasn’t going to be my biggest challenge. Instead, it would be the negative, hostile co-worker who made it very clear she didn’t want me there.

As I tried to learn a new job, learn the names of dozens of co-workers, and the millions of tasks that come with a new job, I also tried to be Jesus to this co-worker, and she wasn’t making it easy. I had many conversations with God as He reminded me that He loved her too, and thus I needed to be kind no matter how she treated me!

As the days stretched into weeks and months, I lobbed questions at God. Why did you put me in this hostile situation? Why does it have to be so hard? I could really, really love it here if it weren’t for this co-worker. God remained quiet, and I knew I needed to continue letting those stretch marks widen and grow.

After some changes in the organization, I heard God say, “Stay until…” (the “until” is between God and me). About a month later, “until” happened. As clearly as I knew God had given me the job, I knew it was time to leave.

As I often do when I’m not ready to move or make a change, I tried to compromise with God. I spent the weekend praying about it and thinking about how I could delay my departure, because I really liked my job. I wanted to stay. Then I heard His still small voice say, “I never intended for you to stay long.” Suddenly it occurred to me He had used my antagonistic co-worker to keep me from planting roots.

Still, I tried to reason with God. Surely, I could stay long enough to help train someone else to take over my job. Every day I stayed, more strain came, and it felt as if God said, “I said NOW!” It sounded a lot like what we parents say to our children when we’re done discussing it’s time to clean their room. I gave my notice and left, armed with new mental stretch marks, proof I’m growing in my walk with the Lord.

Soon after, the company folded and rumors circulated of its demise. God spared me the drama by directing me to leave when I did. Looking back, I realized God used that experience to give me knowledge, connections, and resources for the next phase of my life. After leaving the job, armed with new knowledge, I took the time to write and publish “For The Children”. I began speaking to service organizations about the foster care crisis in our country. These opportunities led to an invitation to join a non-profit that supported families in crisis, which then catapulted me into working with the legislature on laws that better serve children in crisis.

God has a plan for all of our lives. He knows what seasons we need to be in, when we need to be there, what we need to learn in the process, and when we need to leave. Our job is simply to hear His voice and if necessary, stretch so we can be used according to His purposes. Ecclesiastes 3:1 “For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven.” (ESV)