The day I dreaded arrived. As we left the house, I watched our son Tucker walk through each room as if memorizing his childhood home. I watched him spend a sweet moment with each of the pets. I watched him pause and look around one final time. Then it was time to start the three-hour drive to take him to the Navy recruiting station. The quiet drive passed with a flood of emotion, each mile ticking away with a sense of loss and heaviness.

After a special dinner together, we went to our separate hotel rooms for the night, but my mind wouldn’t stop thinking. Tucker must have been lying awake too, as he sent a text. "Mom, do you think I'm really ready?"

I texted back, "Of course you are love. You've prepared and planned for this for a long time." What I really wanted to write was, "No, let's go home NOW and forget this whole idea." But I knew Tucker’s plan to launch into manhood included this dream. I prayed it would lead him to his God-given purpose.

We continued to text back and forth for hours as we shared memories and talked of the future adventure that awaited him. The next morning, we met him at the recruiting center to witness his swearing in. We proudly watched him commit to serve his country, and like the passing of a baton, he passed from our hands into that of the United States Navy. Then it was time to say goodbye, the first of many goodbyes. Our eyes were red from holding back tears. With a final kiss and hug, we watched him go. The dreaded moment had arrived, time to let him go.

On the way home, our youngest son Josh and I held hands in the backseat of the car as we let the tears fall. I kept thinking of the little boy who had grown up way too fast. I thought of how he'd never been on a flight alone and yet, now flying to make connections to Chicago. I thought of how lonely my evening walks were going to be without him, my beloved son, but also my friend.

In the days that passed, we missed Tucker so much. Every day, he was in our thoughts and prayers. As the recruiter advised, I wrote him letters trying to make life sound normal, even though nothing seemed normal. When letters came from him, sharing vulnerable feelings and concerns, again my mama's heart broke. Despite it all, he showed bravery, so I tried to do the same. 1 Peter 5:7 says: “Cast all your anxieties on Him because he cares for you.” (NIV)

Although daily life seemed to fly by in a blur, it felt like he'd been gone for years even though it had only been weeks. The emptiness in our home seemed to grow, but Kassi and Joshua helped fill the void. Finally, the time came to celebrate his graduation from boot camp. I was never prouder to be a mother and an American. Our time went too fast, which meant another goodbye. It never got easier, but FaceTime made our separation bearable, being able to see his face and hear his voice.

In the years that followed, we missed Tucker at family weddings, at graduations, at birthdays, and at holidays. I missed him most during my evening walks when we used to talk about life, ideas, and future plans.

When we remember and honor the Veterans, I do so from the personal perspective of a mama who felt the grief of letting her son go. We missed out on years of his life as he served his country both state-side and during overseas deployments. In that season, our son became a man, willing to sacrifice his life for his country. I am so proud to be the mama of an American serviceman and now a Veteran.

God bless those who serve our country and the families who support them.